We’re not making this up.

2 questions:

1) Will she run in slow motion to the manger?

2) Will David Hasselhoff being playing Joseph and if not, then why not?

(CBS) Pamela Anderson and the Virgin Mary are two names you probably never thought you’d see in the same sentence.

The former “Baywatch” actress has been tapped to star as the Virgin Mary in a comedic version of the Nativity story, set to air next month on the Canadian network CTV.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, the one-hour Canadian TV special will feature a mix of stand-up and sketch comedy, animation and musical performances, as well as appearances by singer Michael Buble and former “Saturday Night Live” star Jon Lovitz.

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A few months ago we posted this news report on ESOAL, a sort of boot camp for the Teen Mania army.

Turns out the local news isn’t the only group interested in investigating exactly what the folks at Teen Mania are up to.

This time, MSNBC got in on the act.

Unfortunately, we missed the original airing. Fortunately, Christian Nightmares and Unreasonable Faith were kind enough to post the episode.

So, here it is in its entirety. Watch it and let us know what you think. Are you ready to join the Teen Mania army?

This is just awesome.

This lady is my new favorite worship leader. For reals.

I love golf.

So, all this time I thought it would awesome to have a driving range next to my church.

Turns out that would actually a little dangerous.

Church fears God and golf balls

By Eric Marrapodi, CNN Belief Blog Co-Editor

(CNN) - Congregants at Faith Evangelical Presbyterian Church in Fairfax, Virginia, aren’t just bowing their heads to pray, they are also ducking golf balls.

Despite nets and other efforts by a driving range that abuts the church property, duffers are shanking tee shots onto the church’s property, knocking out windows and hitting church members.

One shot even hit the church’s youth pastor. “The ball came through the trees and hit him on the head. He fell to the ground, stunned but not unconscious,” Robert Mackey, an elder at the church told CNN affiliate WUSA.

Mackey said he has found 2,600 golf balls on the church’s property in just the past year.

“Our staff lives with the fear of being hit by a golf ball any time and that just doesn’t seem right to me,” he said to WUSA.

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Did you know that you do not have to understand or even be able to read Greek or Hebrew in order to translate the Bible?

In your ignorance you might have assumed that when Bible translation committees get together they pour over the oldest available Greek and Hebrew manuscripts, translate those manuscripts based on the most current scholarship available, and then through the guidance of the Holy Spirit coupled with their linguistic expertise, they make decisions on the difficult to translate words and/or passages, making sure to note the alternative translation when necessary.

Stupid you.

In truth, all Bible translation committees really get together in the dark, secret dungeons that exist underneath every major Christian publisher where they pour over copies of the 1611 KJV and conspire to locate and then change particular passages in order to conform the Bible to their liberal agenda of ushering in the anti-Christ so that they can all take over the world.

So, as Mr. Johnson astutely explains, all Bibles other than the 1611 KJV are clear examples of theologically warped copyright infringement.

Big thanks to Jason at Eisdoxan for posting his junk mail.

Gonna be honest.

I’m terrible at math. Really terrible.

So, I can’t say unequivocally whether or not his numerology is correct.

Of course, it is the Third Eagle of the Apocalypse, so based on that alone this is definitely not correct.

Then again, I have always thought that bar codes were “trying to pull a fast one on” me (3:45 mark). So, maybe Mr. Tapley is on to something after all.

We’re sure this is probably a wonderful ministry that helps lots of women. We are absolutely not making fun of the ministry or the people involved with it.

We’re simply calling attention to the fact that they may want to reword their ministry pitch for the future.

Also, “intimate in-home environment” is probably not a phrase you want to use in conjunction with an already misleading ministry pitch.

As you can tell from the screen capture, you ladies out there have already missed out on your chance to get involved with this ministry, but if you want more information anyway you can check out the site here.

(Thanks to Levi for sharing this)

Yes this is cringe worthy for any Springsteen fan, but you do have to give ApologetiX (the group behind the parody) credit for a pretty spot on vocal sync.

Not that it necessarily redeems the situation, but it certainly makes it more entertaining than a guy with a guitar sitting in his basement in front of his webcam.

UPDATE: Apparently, the original video got busted for copyright infringement. So, we’ve replaced it with a live version of the song. Not quite as good, but still entertaining.

Please forgive us southeast Asia, for we know not what we do.

**Please note, this is not a criticism of Chris Tomlin or his music. His worship songs have become the modern hymns of the church and he seems like a really great guy. Just not sure that the choreographed light show which is often so much a part of  American contemporary worship is something we want to send overseas or even promote here for that matter.